SCHOOL: Cill Iubhair | ADDRESS: Killure Beg, Co. Galway
Why is a bar of toffee like a race horse?
Because the more you lick it the quicker it goes.
Why isn’t a horse hungry going the road?
Because he has a bit in his mouth.
Why is a rheumatic person like a window?
Because he is all pains.
When is an umbrella like suet?
When it is dripping.
Why are policemen so polite?
Because they are civil officers.
Little red Nancy with a little red nose the longer she lives the shorter it grows.
a canale.
Why is the wick of a candle like Athens?
Because it is in the middle of grease.
As I looked out my grandfather’s window I saw the dead carrying the living.
A motor.
If a person fell from the roof of a house what would he fall against first?
His will.
Long legs, straight thighs, small heads and no eyes.
A tongs.
As round as an apple as deep as a cup all the kings horses would never draw it up.
A will.
A little round house full of meat no door to go in to eat.
An egg.
Black and white and read all over.
A paper.
Forty sheep went out a gap forty more went after the shepherd and his dog. How many feet was that?
Two feet.
Little thing, little thing smaller than a mouse. There are more windows in it than a kings house.
A thimble.
A leaper, a jumper, a clipper of corn, a tidy little fellow with two leather horns.
A hare.
What are the most things in the bottom of a sieve?
Corners.
What would a person fill a barrel with to make it lighter?
Holes.
What part of a horse goes in the stable first?
His breath.
Why is the letter “T” like an island?
Because it is in the middle of water.
What is the smallest place that corn ever grew on?
On a person’s toe.
How many thorns are there in an acre of farze?
One and all the rest.
Where was Moses when the candle went out?
In the dark?
why is a lame dog like a schoolboy?
Because he puts down three and carries one.
What is the difference between a schoolmaster and a stamp?
One licks with a stick and the other sticks with a lick.
What did the whale say to Jonas before swallowing him?
Come in out of the wet.
Said the child to the father “How did it come that you are my father and I am not your son”?
His daughter.
How can a person with one eye see twice as much as a person with two eyes?
The person with one eye can see two eyes, and the person with two eyes can only see one eye.
Why isn’t a person’s hand twelve inches long?
Because it is not a foot.
Bibliography
“The Schools’ Collection, Volume 0028, Page 0003” by Dúchas © National Folklore Collection, UCD is licensed under CC BY-NC 4.0.